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"Both said that this was a really common phenomenon: that dating sites have a notoriously low number of gay women, and that gay women are unlikely to flock to those services, ever." they exist, but even if you find one, the odds that she's your age and single and you connect with her on any romantic level at all are slim to none.When a straight woman logs into Tinder, it's a totally different experience.

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The wide range of identities of women-seeking-women not only makes it hard to sign up for apps that only have three options (straight, lesbian, bisexual) but could also explain why the majority of the queer women I spoke to say they prefer to meet dates through friends.

"I build everything on trust," my friend Valey, 27, who meets other women through friends IRL, told me.

"We talked to a lot of people, including founders of other dating sites, and gay women we were friends with," Tessler says.

When Tessler decided to start online matchmaking service The Dating Ring two years ago, she couldn't get nearly enough gay women to match with the few gay women who had signed up for the service.

So how did online dating miss the lesbian community?

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